Welcome to Kelli's World

Today I spent some time outdoors with my niece and my sister, and one of the first things my niece asked me was whether monarchs are to butterflies as cardinals are to birds. I thought for a second and was like yes, they both can be messengers why? She said she kept seeing a monarch butterfly in the backyard and she thought they represented people who have died. I told her the biggest thing is what she felt when she saw it. As we were sitting talk about it, we noticed a cardinal sitting in the tree and then 2 monarch butterflies flying together near the same area. I laughed hard. You see, my aunt passed quickly a couple years ago from brain cancer. She was my mom's sister and they were close, so it was very hard on my mom. My mom has been seeing the same cardinal for the past month and it reminds her fondly of my aunt - her sister. I knew instantly the 2 monarch butterflies represented my maternal grandparents. I told my sister and niece my thoughts and how sometimes we need to b...

My dad was never physical abusive with us, but he was emotional abusive growing up. I remember him telling me I was a failure and would never amount to anything when I was a teenager. Needless to say, we fought a lot back then, and I had some severe anger issues. Thankfully, our story didn't end there. As stated in a previous post, I ended up back in church at the age of 21. I turned 21 in November, and the following Father's Day (ironically enough) is when I had an experience which set me free. Months before I actually got freedom, my dad had come to me to ask for forgiveness. Of course, I was stubborn and told him no. So, fast forward a few months and it's Father's Day. I went to church that morning and then went to spend some time with my family before going to spend time with the best friend. As per our usual, my dad and I got into a fight, and when I got back to church that night for Sunday night service, I was upset. Worship service started and I remember thinki...

My sister and nieces were over yesterday, and at one point in the conversation, my oldest niece commented about how she doesn't stick around places where there is negative energy. I couldn't tell you what we were talking about. All I could think about in that moment was how proud of her I was. At 19 years old, she knew the difference between a positive and negative environment. It's not just negative environments to be watchful for, but people as well. I can't tell you how many times I've told someone to trust their instincts. If a place doesn't feel safe, it probably isn't. If things feel off, they probably are. There's a difference between reacting in fear and listening to your inner voice. However, if something "makes your skin crawl", there's probably a reason for it. Some of us are just naturally sensitive to the energy of a room or a person. When I was a youth pastor, I would tell the teens and young adults all the time to be mind...

I'm on day 2 of a migraine, and what amazes me is that as I laid in bed yesterday with my eyes closed, all I could think about was all the things I needed to get out into the world. I'm seriously not really a writer...I'm a math girl, but sometimes, we just have to just jump out of our comfort zone and do what we think is right. I've been pursuing my relationship with God for over 20 years now, and during that time, I've come to learn to rely on the "just jump"' feeling. The feeling which says, sure you don't know what you are doing, but you feel like you need to do it, so go for it! I liken it to Indiana Jones and the Quest for the Holy Grail. During one of the trials, Indiana is standing at the edge of the cliff and he has to walk out into nothing as a test of his faith. Of course, once he takes a step, he realizes there's actually a bridge, and he's able to get across. However, that first step is something that sticks in my mind. In ...

On my 21st birthday, I met my best friend. At first, everything was amazing. It wasn't long before I completely let him in and he became like a brother to me. He was family. I was pretty sheltered and naïve, and quite loving, so when things took I turn, I completely missed it. He brought me to church and we could talk for hours about anything and everything. I remember walking into church the first time, and feeling like I had arrived home. I knew it was where I belonged. It wasn't long before I rededicated my life to Christ and was all in. (I had grown up in church, but walked away around the time I was 18 because honestly I thought Christians were hypocrites and even though I never stopped believing in Christ, I didn't really get the point of church.)  My best friend and I did everything together. I spent hours with him daily and I trusted him completely. Little by little things began to change, and honestly, at the time, I didn't quite see the change clearly. I was...

I remember clearly the night my grandfather passed away. It was night time, and I felt something in my room. I didn't understand a whole lot in the Spirit Realm at this point in my life, but I knew something was there. I remember trying to hide myself by covering my face with my blanket (yes, I was in my 20s lol)...as if that was going to protect me. After a while, the feeling went away and I was able to emerge from the blanket. A few minutes later, the funeral home called looking for my mom, and I learned my grandfather had passed. I knew at that moment, he had come to say goodbye. This wasn't the last time I had visitation from loved ones no longer with us. Every once in a while I will feel my grandmother's presence (my mom's mom). She was always my encourager, and when I need her, I can sense that she is there. Sometimes, I feel my grandfather (my mom's dad) when my mom is going through things, and I know his spirit is there to give her comfort. I've even s...

As the full moon approaches, I can't help but sit here and think about the Spirit Realm. For me, the Spirit Realm is a fascinating place. It's a place filled with symbolism, and yet sometimes literal observations.  Personally, I tend to be either clairvoyant or clairsentient. Meaning, I can sometimes see things as clearly as I see my hand in front of my face. Other times though, it's more a feeling or a knowing than actual "sight". Whether visitations or symbolic representations, visions into the Spirit Realm can be wonderful ways for gaining deeper understanding.  Those understandings gain me wisdom or help me to deal with something important in my life.  I tend to deal a lot with the angelic; however, not all visitations I've dealt with in my life have been angels. I've seen some not great things as well as many things I would have said don't exist. The first time I saw fae, I had to have a big sit down conversation with God because it didn't c...

Who am I? That's a question I've asked myself a lot lately. Not long ago, I would have started with well, I'm a 45 yr old single Christian woman. However, I've learned that those things aren't who I am. They are just labels which describe a part of me, but doesn't at all really express me. I'm a woman who's learning to love all of herself. Some days that is easier than others, but I can say for certainty that I love myself more today than yesterday, and will love myself more tomorrow than today. I don't make excuses anymore for the person that I am. I struggle with my weight, but even my weight doesn't define me. It makes things harder for me sometimes, but that's a topic for another day. Even being a Christian doesn't define me. You'd think it should, but in a world where that word is thrown around so frequently, it doesn't mean as much as it used to....it's like the word love. So many meanings and so much watered down pe...